


will he

by gkyunnie1



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Abuse, Angst, Heavy Angst, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, M/M, One Shot, Past Rape/Non-con, Past Relationship(s), Physical Abuse, Sad Ending, Short One Shot, Verbal Abuse, i guess, sorry - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-20
Updated: 2018-05-20
Packaged: 2019-05-09 11:20:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 758
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14715047
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gkyunnie1/pseuds/gkyunnie1
Summary: Will your shadow remember the sway of my hips?please do NOT read this, this is full of sensitive content. this is not a fantasy. this is not an ideal relationship. if you know anyone who is in an abusive relationship, help them. if you're in an abusive relationship, find help. don't stay.





	will he

**Author's Note:**

> stop reading this while you still can.

Ten leaned on the palm of his hand, watching random couples and others grinding against each others. Ten wished Lucas would still be with him, but he is all alone in the bar, where the music is deafening, where the air smells like alcohol, smoke and sex, where the bar stools are high and broken. Where he and Lucas met for the first time.

Ten stood up from the bar stool he was sitting on, and made his way to the dance floor. His makeup was smudged from all of the crying, his hair messy from pulling it too hard and his arms blue-ish from the bruises he got from Lucas, when he earlier threw Ten all across their apartment.

Ten walked through the mass of people, slowly, swaying softly from side to side. He deserved every single bruise on his body, his bloody lip and his black eye. He did Lucas wrong, cheated on him multiple times, broke his heart into pieces and then blamed everything on him. He loved seeing Lucas so vulnerable and weak and it seemed like Lucas loved to see Ten cry, beg and bleed. Ten remembered screaming at Lucas right before he was thrown across the room. Ten remembered the look in Lucas eyes and his voice, when he told Ten to stay quiet. 

Still, Ten loved Lucas a lot. Their relationship was toxic, broken and wrong in any possible way. Ten loved the way Lucas looked at him, when they had sex, he loved how gentle he was with him at times, when he wasn't angry for Ten for another meaningless reason. He loved the way he caressed Ten's thighs, how he kissed him softly, and the way he left marks all over his body. When he was angry, sex was the last thing Ten looked for, his punches felt a lot better then. Ten hated the way Lucas made him cry and scream, how he would hold him down, and demand him to shut up. He hated how kind he was the morning after, he  _hated_ the way he always fell for it. Whenever Ten could, he would run away from their home, get someone from bar or just hook up with his friend. Whenever he could, he screamed cruel things at him, but he could never punch him. 

Ten walked out of the door, and breathed in deep. The air was fresh. He looked around to see, if Jaehyun was already there to pick him up for the last time after a fight with Lucas. Once Ten saw his car, he walked towards it, and got in. Ten put his seat belt on, and from the side mirror he could see Lucas looking for him. 

"Can you please start driving?", Ten asked in a small voice. He deserved to be punished, and so did Lucas. Ten kept on looking at Lucas from the side mirror, until he faded away. It was better this way. Ten didn't say a word during the car ride out of the city, only wished for a change, in both his and Lucas' actions. 

Ten closed his eyes. He was gonna miss his warm arms around him, he was gonna miss his soft smile every morning, when Ten stood in the kitchen cooking breakfast. He was gonna miss the way Lucas kissed him and held him. But he weren't going to cry for him anymore. He weren't going to scream at him anymore. He weren't going to hurt him anymore. 

Ten deeply regretted the words he had screamed in his face, and the way he came home after a night out with "friends" covered in hickeys, completely fucked out. He regretted how he didn't end their relationship right away, when he was hit for the first time, or when he decided that Lucas weren't enough for him.

He didn't know, if he was gonna see him anymore. He didn't know, if he was returning to the city anymore. He didn't mind, that he left all of his stuff at their apartment, and he didn't mind that all of his personal belongings were already destroyed before he even left. He just wished for the best for both of them, since he still loved Lucas a lot, and probably was going to love until the end of time. He would remember Lucas from the pictures on the pocket of his jacket, and the scars on his arms. Even thought the thought of him hurt, it was the only thing that made him feel home wherever he was.

 


End file.
